Thursday, January 05, 2006


A piece of my heart is missing

It has been 8 months since I stopped talking to my best friend and love of my life. For many reasons, mainly really dumb ones, we stopped talking. However there is a problem I am buying my car from him so every month I have to make a car payment to him. I usually put the money in his account and then I let him know I have made the payment. For about 5 months I have not said anything to him. However, I only have a few payments left and the car is mine, also the car is still registered to him and it expires this month. Well I called his moms house to let her know I have made the payment and see if she will have him call me so I can get all the information I need from him.

To make a long story short, he answered the phone and we ended up talking, the problem with this is we tried to catch up on everything that has happened, in my case a lot, and we talked for almost 45 minutes. The only thing is we didn't get everything worked out and he had to go.. He promised he would call me back and an hour later and he still hasn't.

I am sitting here and I feel that my heart is empty. I thought I had moved on and that I didn't need him anymore. I know I am happy and that my life will continue but then I am reminded of all the things we had and now my heart hurts. It longs to have what we had back and I know deep in my soul that that will never happen. I keep asking myself and wondering if he feels the same way. But it doesn't matter we made the decision together that we were better off with out each other. So now I find a place to put the broken piece and hope that one day someone will come along with some super glue and fix what I cant.

I'm sorry. :(

That completely sucks.
Someone across the world here knows exactly how you feel. Hang in there.
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